3 Pair of Dream-Killing Words: Pair #1

Words are important.  They convey ideas, beliefs, and emotion.  Words carry the messages of our heart.  They’re how we most directly express what’s inside of us.

Words are potentially the most powerful thing on earth.  They’ve shaped philosophies that have determined the course of nations (for good and for evil), formed uniting ideas of protest that have reversed horrible injustices, and created messages inspiring us to reach higher and do better.

Skillfully used, words comfort the discouraged and heal the broken-hearted, give a fitting word of counsel when needed, and rebuke the wayward one who’s straying off the path and heading towards danger.

The Bible says life and death are in the power of the tongue.  There isn’t a truer statement.

That’s right, words can destroy as well.  We’ve all seen this, and some of us have personally experienced it.

Of course, words can also fuel us to move towards our goals or away from our goals.  Frankly, our words can become our biggest obstacle to success.

The first two words we’re looking at today are What If.

“What if I can’t complete the project?”

“What if he doesn’t come through for us?”

“What if the weather doesn’t cooperate tomorrow?”

“What if things don’t work out?”

“What if he says no?”

“What if they laugh?”

“What if they don’t laugh?”

“What if she forgets?”

“What if my car won’t start?”

“What if it doesn’t last?”

“What if . . . I fail?”

There can be a good use of What-If, such as when we’re planning, and calmly and thoughtfully considering various challenging future scenarios.  We do this so we can be prepared.

However, the What-If we’re talking about here is different.  This kind of What-If creates needless anxiety, worry, and fear.

Very often, this kind of What-If has a low probability of actually happening.  And if it does happen, the results are usually not as dire as we imagine.

Yes, What-If’s can create a lot of unnecessary hand-wringing and worry.

And this becomes a huge problem because mismanaged worry keeps us stuck!

So watch those What-If’s.  Confront them with reality, radical rationality, and a good dose of optimism.

In your mind, calmly state your intention as to what you’ll do if the What-If actually happens.

Then, for goodness sakes, move on with your day!  Don’t linger in the company of a What-If.

“What if my car won’t start???” . . . “If my car won’t start, I’ll call my mechanic and take the bus to work.”

“What if the weather doesn’t cooperate tomorrow???” . . . “If the weather doesn’t cooperate, we’ll have the party in the house and make the best of it.  We can still have a great time.”

“What if I fail???” . . . “If I fail, I’ll learn everything I can from the experience, AND I will refuse to beat myself up over it!”

What-If’s can be pesky if you’ve allowed them any measure of rule in your mind.  But you can break their power and end their rule.

Give them their eviction notice and boot them out of your head!  They don’t belong there.  They are squatters, with no right to take up space in your thinking.

Be vigilant.  Watch for them, and nail them as soon as they pop up.

Your success may depend on it.

--Sean Cox, Chicago

Scroll to Top