How do you deal with barriers? First, let’s define what a barrier is so that we’re on the same page.
How about this: a barrier is something that blocks us from reaching our goal. A barrier implies a goal, otherwise it’s not a barrier.
What types of barriers are there?
- yourself
- other people
- “reality”
Regarding yourself, as with other people, I’m referring to things like our attitudes, beliefs, emotions, bad habits, decisions, actions, and timing.
And regarding “reality”, what I mean by this are the things that “are what they are”—they aren’t necessarily anyone’s fault, but they’re part of the factual landscape that we must contend with.
For example, bad weather, a broken furnace (due to age), or a new law that’s been passed.
And so forth. When it comes to barriers, the sky’s the limit.
Think of some big goal that you’ve been trying to hit, but it hasn’t gone as well as you would’ve liked (what? You HAVEN’T been trying to hit a big goal?! Seriously, this has to change—go check this out and thank me later).
Now, what do you identify as the barrier(s) that has kept you from reaching this goal? Remember, if you can’t identify it, you can’t overcome it!
As far as overcoming your barriers is concerned, what are your options?
If there were a physical barrier in your way—let’s say a gigantic rock—your options would play out like this:
- go over it
- go around it
- go under it
- go through it
I think of one of my childhood heroes, running back for the Chicago Bears, Walter Payton, greatest running back of all time. “Sweetness” was his nickname.
I grew up in Wisconsin, so of course I hated the Bears, but as a football fan, how could you not love Walter Payton ("Sean trivia"—who’s my favorite running back of all time? No, it’s not Payton. Email me the correct answer, and you get a free coaching session)?
Payton would deal with his barriers—the opposing team’s defense—in every way imaginable.
“Go over it”—definitely he did this. When the Bears were at the one- yard line, he was famous for leaping like a bionic frog over any stacked defense he faced. He was unstoppable at the goal line.
“Go around it”—definitely he did this, juking, faking, and running wide around his pursuers.
“Go under it”—I may need some help with this one, though he certainly could put his head down and get low.
“Go through it”—my favorite. Even though he was more exciting in his flashier moves, I loved it when he just put his head down 
and rammed straight ahead, punishing his would-be tacklers. And he had the best stiff-arm I've ever seen. He wasn’t big at all, he didn’t have lightning speed, but he could hit very hard.
Back to you! When you’re facing a barrier, are you like Walter? Be creative, be resilient, be tough.
And don’t be a one-trick pony. There are some people who only deal with barriers by putting their head down and ramming full-speed ahead, trying to overpower everyone and everything in their way. Some running backs are like that. The bulldozers among us.
But there are times when other courses of action are better—way better. For example, if your barrier is another person—let’s say, in a business deal—you certainly could get aggressive and use tactics that relied on force and power.
Maybe that’ll work, but maybe it will also destroy a relationship. Maybe you’ll win the battle but lose the war.
Or, you could come to the table and negotiate.
Or, you could take a step back and wait, e.g., for a more opportune time, OR to reconsider your options (this way of handling barriers didn’t make it into my football analogy, for obvious reasons, but it’s an important one).
You get the point.
Having a well-rounded barrier management system at your disposal is crucial. That way, when one strategy doesn’t work, you have other arrows in your quiver.
Of course, you may need to develop and grow to be better at some of these things, but hey, join the club. Nobody’s “arrived” yet.
There are other ways to deal with barriers that we didn’t look at today, for example, “EMBRACING your barrier”. I’ll let you chew on that one. Again, it wouldn’t have fit well with my football analogy!
Don’t make the choice (or the “non-choice choice”) to allow your barriers to keep you from your most important goals. Barriers are challenges that we MUST engage with, and dispose of.
Go forth and overcome.
--Sean Cox, Chicago