There are times in all of our lives when we simply need to ENDURE.
Too many people quit things too soon.
How deep is your endurance for those difficult times in life?
Now, let me say that there are some things we definitely should NOT endure, but instead should get rid of, or set strong boundaries between us and “it”.
But there are ALSO things that we either can’t or shouldn’t “get rid of”. At least for that particular season of life that we’re in.
In one of my ebooks I used the term “Hard Realities” to mean anything in our lives that probably won’t change anytime soon, that we have no control over changing, AND that we’ve made a thoughtful choice to stay in, for some good reason. Or, maybe we truly cannot make an exit at this point.
We all have those Hard Realities to deal with at different points in our lives, sometimes more than others. We find ourselves in a difficult situation, not necessarily because we did anything wrong, but because of things beyond our control. For example, having a difficult boss.
But in this “difficult boss” scenario, as challenging as it is, we may have decided that there are good reasons for us to continue working for this person, at least for now, and will figure out how to do our best in this situation, appropriately protecting ourselves where we need to, and look for ways to thrive in the midst of all this, if possible.
So back to the power of endurance. There are things, like the difficult boss, when we do all that we can do, on our ends, to thrive as much as the reality will allow, and then BEYOND that, we are relying on our ability to endure. To hang in there. To “embrace the suck”. To practice patience. To breathe deeply and keep going and do the best we can.
It’s important that we have our “endurance muscle” adequately built and strengthened for these situations. Here are some ways to build our endurance over time, like we would build a muscle. I’m sure you have your own to add to the list.
1- Lean into difficult things rather than avoiding them. Sure, run in the other direction from some difficult things, but take on the challenge when you’re up for it and when you won’t be harmed. Of course, there may be times you won’t really have much of a choice!
2- Occasionally put yourself in low-cost challenging situations. For example, something where you challenge yourself physically. This depends on your current level of fitness, and certainly don’t hurt yourself, but do things that challenge you in this way, eg, walk or run further or faster than you usually do, practice a stretching program, practice yoga poses, do bodyweight exercises and continue scaling up the level of difficulty (my fave), or do some “static holds”. For those of you who are already physically fit and strong, build up to holding a “horse stance” for 1 minute, and then work for 2 minutes! Or, hold yourself in a mid-way pushup position for a minute, or slowly build up to it. Just to push yourself and practice mental toughness.
3- If you are in the midst of a Hard Reality, figure out what you CAN control in this situation, and do so. Always stay on top of what you can control, and max it out. This is where the sweet spot of your power lies.
4- Practice proactively nurturing a positive attitude and perspective. See beyond this situation, and get to the bigger picture. See how this will help contribute to something better in the long run.
5- Remind yourself of who you want to BE in the midst of this Hard Reality. Who do you want to show up as everyday? What does your “best aspirational self” look like in the middle of all this? Strive to be that person whenever you face this Hard Reality.
6- Don’t make this Hard Reality your entire life. Have enough ways to “fill your tank” to give you the cushion you need to endure. Stay meaningfully and robustly connected to people, places, things, activities, and interests that energize you rather than drain you.
7- And if enduring the Hard Reality is causing you more harm than good, then consider an effective exit plan.
Each of these 7 suggestions could be 7 entire books, but you get the picture.
What can you add to this list of ways to build your endurance muscle?
Until next time, stay strong.
Sean
Curious about private 1:1 coaching?
https://www.seanpatrickcox.com/individual-coaching/